Someone tell me am i defeated or do i have another way of looking at things! HELP?
reena asked:
In February, after spending 3 months prior trying to find my sister another home for our father, (she called every morning griping, complaining and just plain disrespectful about him) she called me very upset and gave me, 2 wks to find him another place to live, nursing home i dont care..just get him out. (he lived with her, her husband and son for 2yrs)..she has mental depression dr. told her bipolar but she refused to discuss it or take meds…she has been like this all her life. Because my father has no dementia, there is nothing really wrong with him, and because he lived in sadness and depression with her never left his room to try to avoid her and the family (one time he fell trying to look in his closet and she ranted and raved to all of us “why in the hell was he in his closet anyhow” i realized there was nothing i could do or say because we where happy that he was not in a nursing home ( he had been there b4, it was awful) none of my other sisters could take him and because i am single, 1 son and full of compassion for a man who treated me like shit all my life i took him…
it has been since february, i couldnt find a 3 bedroom for under 800 and all utilities so we bought a house, funny the problem is not dad…did i mention that my 8 yr old has adhd, ocd, anger issues and possible bipolar, did i mention that i have lupus, raynauds, sjorgens, scleroderma, hypothryroidism, acid reflux disease, nueropathy, depression caused by all of the above and i am only 39…so the above comes to pass…no problem
but here comes my 2 sisters, the others (theres 11 of us..9 who dont give a shit) one who is old school , self serving and literally told me he didnt raise me i have to obligation she failed to say that in her last TWO marriages with 2 kids and a grandchild she moved back to dads house it seemed her past was not an issue then…the second feels so guilty (she is daddy’s little girl although i am the baby of the family, i am the youngest..and NO i am not jeasous..she and i are..uh where really close)..because the second also has depression issues, a child with a behavior problem and a young one following along she seems to think that she can come into my home criticize, get rude, nippy she puts too much on her plate then she takes is out on me…if i speak up she then will accuse me “another sister telling me off” or “u must not be taking ur meds” she has crossed bounderies with my son “he is my God child i can spoil him” I say no to something she in front of him will make a rude disrespectful comment or excuse his behavior… isay ask me b4 u invite him over she invites and then says “oh sorry i didnt ask u first”….someone help me dad is not the problem…she is they are, i do nothing right, if i speak up…well she must be on her period, she must not b taking her meds…they have actually caused so much stress tears anxiety that i am back seeing a counseler,…i want to sell the house, give dad to them and leave…but i know it would be toooo much for my son (he is absolutely first)….bye from defeated in ohio…by the way i only have said half of it…there is soooo much more…
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In February, after spending 3 months prior trying to find my sister another home for our father, (she called every morning griping, complaining and just plain disrespectful about him) she called me very upset and gave me, 2 wks to find him another place to live, nursing home i dont care..just get him out. (he lived with her, her husband and son for 2yrs)..she has mental depression dr. told her bipolar but she refused to discuss it or take meds…she has been like this all her life. Because my father has no dementia, there is nothing really wrong with him, and because he lived in sadness and depression with her never left his room to try to avoid her and the family (one time he fell trying to look in his closet and she ranted and raved to all of us “why in the hell was he in his closet anyhow” i realized there was nothing i could do or say because we where happy that he was not in a nursing home ( he had been there b4, it was awful) none of my other sisters could take him and because i am single, 1 son and full of compassion for a man who treated me like shit all my life i took him…
it has been since february, i couldnt find a 3 bedroom for under 800 and all utilities so we bought a house, funny the problem is not dad…did i mention that my 8 yr old has adhd, ocd, anger issues and possible bipolar, did i mention that i have lupus, raynauds, sjorgens, scleroderma, hypothryroidism, acid reflux disease, nueropathy, depression caused by all of the above and i am only 39…so the above comes to pass…no problem
but here comes my 2 sisters, the others (theres 11 of us..9 who dont give a shit) one who is old school , self serving and literally told me he didnt raise me i have to obligation she failed to say that in her last TWO marriages with 2 kids and a grandchild she moved back to dads house it seemed her past was not an issue then…the second feels so guilty (she is daddy’s little girl although i am the baby of the family, i am the youngest..and NO i am not jeasous..she and i are..uh where really close)..because the second also has depression issues, a child with a behavior problem and a young one following along she seems to think that she can come into my home criticize, get rude, nippy she puts too much on her plate then she takes is out on me…if i speak up she then will accuse me “another sister telling me off” or “u must not be taking ur meds” she has crossed bounderies with my son “he is my God child i can spoil him” I say no to something she in front of him will make a rude disrespectful comment or excuse his behavior… isay ask me b4 u invite him over she invites and then says “oh sorry i didnt ask u first”….someone help me dad is not the problem…she is they are, i do nothing right, if i speak up…well she must be on her period, she must not b taking her meds…they have actually caused so much stress tears anxiety that i am back seeing a counseler,…i want to sell the house, give dad to them and leave…but i know it would be toooo much for my son (he is absolutely first)….bye from defeated in ohio…by the way i only have said half of it…there is soooo much more…
Create a video blog…instantly.
I stopped going to anyone except for the asthma once I found out “everything.” Some things are too overwhelming if you are catering to or admtting them all the time. Yeah, my house isn’t in the greatest shape right now, but I’ve got what I need to continue living and maybe helping or affecting other. I don’t want to be remembered as someone who gave up and died in a motocart everyday whining about pain.
Seriously. It is sheer stubbornness that gets me by, and it might be stupid or closeminded but it is what i need…. It might help you…. Don’t have to worry what med counteracts another or what med makes other condtions worse or creates new ones if all you’re taking is what you will absolutely die without. Once you simplify that aspect of life, you start seeing it is not so bad or hard to simplify others you normally wouldn’t have….